People who know me well understand what a big deal it is for me to commit to something, especially anything smacking of religion, but next week I’m going to be taking the precepts (jukai) at Shasta Abbey.
This is something I’ve been thinking about for a long time and finally decided to formally make a move by joining in the Abbey’s yearly “keeping of the ten precepts” retreat. It doesn’t mean I’m aligning myself with Shasta Abbey or even with Zen Buddhism, just that I’m making a more formal commitment to Buddhism.
Since it’s a path that seems to be helping me, it feels like the right thing to do. And, like Buddhism, I can’t really find any argument with the ten precepts. They’re all about living more consciously, being more present in the world.
Maybe I’m seeing such a clear difference in how I’m reacting–or not reacting to life, that I want to hold onto whatever this is. For one, my trademark worry seems to have evaporated. Somehow I seem to get by every month whether I worry about it or not. My kids will be who they are regardless of how much I worry. So I don’t.